She Has A Friend Who Does Not Wear Hijab
I have a friend from high school days who does not wear hijab and
I do. I have advised her often to wear hijab, but she does not
want to wear it. Now we are in university but my mother is now
insisting that I do not go out with my friend or walk with her,
because she wears tight clothes and does not wear hijab. My mother
tells me: If you walk with her you will incur sin like her. Is
this true? I love my friend and cannot keep away from her. My only
contact with her now is by phone only, to see how she is, and I
pray for her to be guided. What is the solution?.
Praise be to Allaah.
There is no problem such that you should seek a solution for it.
What your mother says is correct and you have to obey her. This is
obligatory for you for two reasons: from an Islamic point of view
and because she is your mother.
There is no doubt that the Muslim is influenced by his friend,
especially if he loves his friend dearly, because that love makes
him turn a blind eye to his friend’s sins and errors, and it may
lead him to admire him to such an extent that he begins to imitate
him in everything, even the way he walks. This is something that
is seen a great deal but no one can deny it.
Moreover, one of the negative consequences of your walking with
that friend who is uncovered is that you will also become a focal
point for fools and human “wolves” who will judge you in the same
way as they judge your friend. Her wanton display will encourage
young men to enjoy looking at her, and if you agree to keep
company with one who is like that, then how will those evil men
regard you? You should understand that this friendship will turn
to enmity of the Day of Resurrection, because this friendship was
not based on adhering to the laws of Allah and obeying Him.
Allah says (interpretation of the meaning): “Friends on that Day
will be foes one to another except Al-Muttaqoon (the pious)” [az-Zukhruf 43:67].
Al-Qurtubi (may Allah have mercy on him) said: “Friends on that
Day” i.e., the Day of Resurrection “will be foes one to another”
i.e., they will be enemies to one another and will curse one
another “except Al-Muttaqoon (the pious)” who will be friends in
this world and in the Hereafter.
End quote from Tafseer al-Qurtubi, 16/95
Ibn Katheer (may Allah have mercy on him) said in Tafseer Ibn
Katheer (7/237): That is, every friendship that was for the sake
of anything other than Allah will, on the Day of Resurrection,
turn into enmity, except for that which was for the sake of Allah,
may He be glorified and exalted; it will last for ever. End quote.
What the Muslim must do is to keep away from bad companions and
choose righteous friends who will guide him towards what is good
and help him to obey his Lord, may He be exalted. As the saying
goes: tell me who your friends are and I will tell you who you
are.
The poet ‘Adiyy ibn Zayd said:
Do not ask about the man; look at his friend, for a man will
follow in the footsteps of his friends.
It is sufficient deterrent from having bad friends for the Muslim
to remember the warning against that, that is mentioned in the
Prophet’s Sunnah:
It was narrated that Abu Moosa al-Ash‘ari (may Allah be pleased
with him) said: The Messenger of Allah (blessings and peace of
Allah be upon him) said:
“The likeness of a good companion and a bad companion is that of
one who carries musk and one who works the bellows. With the
carrier of musk, either he will give you some or you will buy some
from him, or you will notice a good smell from him; as for the one
who works the bellows, either he will burn your clothes or you
will notice a bad smell from him.”
Narrated by al-Bukhaari, 1995; Muslim, 2628
Shaykh ‘Abd al-‘Azeez ibn Baaz (may Allah have mercy on him) said:
Keeping company with good people is one of the best of deeds that
bring one closer to Allah, and is one of the best means of
attaining blessing. On the other hand, keeping company with bad
people such as disbelievers and those who commit sin openly is not
permissible, and is one of the things that lead to a bad end and
cause one to adopt their attitudes and deeds.
What the believer must do is try hard to keep company with good
people and avoid keeping company with bad people. It is not
permissible to obey parents or others with regard to keeping
company with bad people or forsaking good people, because the
Prophet (blessings and peace of Allah be upon him) said:
“Obedience is only with regard to that which is right and proper.”
And he (blessings and peace of Allah be upon him) said: “There is
no obedience to any created being if it involves disobedience to
the Creator.”
End quote. Fataawa Islamiyyah, 4/206, 207
We should point out here that what your mother (may Allah preserve
her) said about you incurring sin like that of your friend is far
from being correct; rather you will incur the sin of a friendship
that is not allowed. But if you approve of her actions, Allah
forbid, (then what your mother says is correct). But you say that
you are trying to advise her and remind her. So walking with her
is not permissible and being friends with her is bad for you and
your family, in addition to it going against your mother’s
instructions. It is sufficient for you to keep in touch with her
by phone whilst remembering that it is essential to carry on
exhorting her and trying to make her fear Allah, may He be
exalted, in the hope that Allah will guide her, in which case
reward will be yours.
For more information please see the answers to questions no.
21918, 10231 and 11266
And Allah knows best.
Source: http://islamqa.info
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